When your daughter tells you she is gay
Inside:Is my teen daughter a lesbian? Maybe or maybe not, but here’s how to handle this sensitive teenage sexuality topic
This post was contributed by Jill Whitney, LMFT
So much about teen sexuality is different from what it was a couple decades ago.
Where once it was awkward, if not threatening , to be anything other than straight, we now talk openly about a spectrum of orientations and genders. Sexual diversity has broken out of the closet—to the point where being LGBTQ is caring of cool.
So don’t be surprised if your teen or even tween daughter announces at some aim that she’s a female homosexual. It’s more common than you might think these days.
But you may wonder whether your teen daughter is a lesbian for real, or whether it’s just a phase. Maybe she’s just experimenting; maybe she’ll mature out of it. Or maybe not.
How do you know?
Acceptance Needs to Be Unconditional
Unfortunately, there’s no way to tell. Some girls who experiment with same-sex partners close up happily straight. Other young women find they’re attracted only or primarily to women and characterize as lesbian for their whole lives.
Ways to look out, and signal your support.
Minus18 supports LGBTQIA+ youth all over Australia. Resources, professional development, student workshops, and online campaigns. But there’s one part of the society in particular that we receive a huge amount of questions from, and who come to Minus18 looking for information and support: parents of LGBTQIA+ young people.
We’re so delighted to reveal these fresh online resources for parents: four videos and four accompanying articles, all about supporting your child (and the community!).
Having the sense that your child might be LGBTQIA+ can be a modern experience, which can reach with questions or concerns about what this means for them or your family.
1. “Coming out” can happen at any age
There’s no one way to be queer, and someone’s identity can evolve over time. After all, no one’s the same person at 30 as they were at 10! So it’s important to observe that many LGBTQIA+ people can realise their persona – or at least a part of their identity – at a very young age, and that their identity can change. And as a result, people can arrive out multiple times in their lives!
Everyone’s journey is different, and coming out can occur at any age. So
How Can I Endorse My 11-Year-Old Who Says She’s Bisexual?
By Shafia Zaloom
January 13, 2021
Dear Your Teen,
Recently, my 11-year-old daughter became interested in all things LGBTQ. She came out to me a rare weeks ago as bisexual. She is not sexually active in any way but feels, in her words, that she mostly crushes on girls.
I endorse my daughter 100 percent and always will. Who she loves makes no difference to me.
I told her that sexuality can be very fluid, and that she should not become too attached to who or what she feels she is. Later when she is more sure of her identity, and she wants to have it front and center or to get deeply interested in a movement, by all means do so. But right now, I think it’s in her benefit to take her time.
Can you give me any advice, especially on my recommendation that there is no rush to identify as anything just yet?
EXPERT | Shafia Zaloom
Dear Supportive Dad,
It is a testament to your relationship with your daughter that she feels safe to share how she’s feeling about her sexual identity. I encourage all parents to communicate the same perspective on sexuality: It’s positive, it’s fluid for many, and it’s
5 Powerful Things You Can Do If Your Youth Tells You, "I'm Gay."
You may not have been expecting to hear the words "I'm gay" from your child. Not only did you never envision it, but your religious beliefs and values also do not align with same-sex relationships. So, what do you do now? How do you respond to your child telling you they're gay?
As a parent, you may contain had the inclination that your child may be gay. As a outcome, the news may simply confirm your suspicions, and the conversation may be easy. On the opposite, you may feel irate or shocked. Likewise, you may struggle with the idea and have a natural tendency to close down the conversation or put it off as merely a phase they're going through. In existence, regardless of how you feel, the way you respond in the first five minutes could place the tone for your child for years to come.
In this article, we'll discuss the critical moments after your child comes to you and says, "I'm gay." With the help of Dr. Devon Mills is a licensed therapist in Atlanta, GA, we'll highlight five potent things you can execute to help create a place of safety and love, regardless of how you feel about
10 Things To Express When Your Toddler Comes Out to You
Respect & Fairness
Despite the progress that has been made in recent years around LGBT+ rights, visibility and equality, coming out can still be an intensely stressful and vulnerable exposure for many.
Supporting Your Child's Coming Out Journey
Young people are beginning to touch more able to express their sexuality and/or gender, withthe proportion of juvenile people who spot as heterosexual in the UK steadily decreasing. Although coming out means embracing yourself fully, it also means facing potential rejection from people who are not supportive of you.
All coming out stories are diverse. If your kid comes out to you, it can be surprising and sometimes unexpected. However, it’s important for parents of LGBT+ youth to recognise that the reaction they have to their child coming out to them matters. The LGBT+ coming out conversation is likely one your child will remember for the rest of their life, so it is important to respond in a manner that is supportive and sensitive to your child’s needs.
Thankfully, there are a few things you can speak to make the conversation an easier, more positive trial for the